With Grace and Nobility

Even though Spring is springing it is still rather stark outside. The trees are still bare, the grass isn't quite green, the garden is toiled but lacks visual vitality......in some ways it's still lonesome outside. But, the sun is peaking it's beams a little today and the temperature is rising.

I was visited this morning by a male and female cardinal. They flew after each other and around each other and flirted on a tree branch. It was beautiful to watch them. Their red colors were vivid, particularly the male. Amidst the bleak and bare trees they shown brightly. These two lovebirds, as I imagined them to be, inspired me and this blog post. Time to find out why.......

"The symbolic meaning of cardinals deals with vibrancy and brilliance.

As we observe the cardinal – particularly against the backdrop of the stark winter months, we are reminded that even when things appear bleak or isolated, there is always the presence of beauty, hope, and love.

Cardinals encourage us to express our brilliance and reveal our truest selves. Their radiant red is a symbol for us to recognize the gifts in our hearts that we have to give to others in love and friendship.

Here is a quick summary of the attributes & symbolic meaning of cardinals:

•Sexuality
•Vibrancy
•Renewal
•Self-reflection
•Friendliness
•Vitality
•Goodwill
•Industry
•Brilliance

As we might guess, a large part of the animal symbolism of the cardinal comes from the brilliant red color of the males. This shock of red, especially against the stark backdrop of winter snow, is a magnificent sight. The male cardinal reminds us passion, warmth and vibrancy is available to us - even in under the cloak of winter's grey clouds. Interestingly, the more bold and bright his color is, the more successful the cardinal will be at prolonging his lineage. Dull colored male cardinals are less likely to mate successfully than bright ones.

True to the fire of his color, the crimson cardinal has got some major spunk. He will aggressively defend his territory, and fight attackers with ferocity. Indeed, they have been known to fight ghost males (their reflections) in mirrors for hours on end.

Both male and female give us glorious songs. Along with peeps and pips and warbles, the tuned ear can also hear "cheer, cheer, cheer!" Very appropriate to the animal symbolism of cardinals, because they are a delight to both eyes and ears.

The cardinal reminds us to hold ourselves with pride - not ego pride. Rather, the cardinal asks us to stand a little taller, be a bit more regal, step into our natural confidence as if we were born to lead with grace and nobility."

Come and join the living.......

Peace Train ::

Now I've been happy lately,
thinking about the good things to come
And I believe it could be,
something good has begun

Oh I've been smiling lately,
dreaming about the world as one
And I believe it could be,
some day it's going to come

Cause out on the edge of darkness,
there rides a peace train
Oh peace train take this country,
come take me home again

Now I've been smiling lately,
thinking about the good things to come
And I believe it could be,
something good has begun

Oh peace train sounding louder
Glide on the peace train
Come on now peace train
Yes, peace train holy roller

Everyone jump upon the peace train
Come on now peace train

Get your bags together,
go bring your good friends too
Cause it's getting nearer,
it soon will be with you

Now come and join the living,
it's not so far from you
And it's getting nearer,
soon it will all be true

Now I've been crying lately,
thinking about the world as it is
Why must we go on hating,
why can't we live in bliss

Cause out on the edge of darkness,
there rides a peace train
Oh peace train take this country,
come take me home again

All is well

"The best thing one can do when it's raining is to let it rain." ~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

A lesson in trust. It all sorts itself out. All is well. Be still and listen. Trust that you know what it the next step and if you don't.....stop! Listen, be quiet in your mind. Let the rain fall. The fog will lift and your path will be clear. The rain is a time for cleansing, renewal, nourishment. Don't fight it. Allow the rain that must fall in your life to come. Don't hide from it. Listen, feel, absorb, be cleansed. Then, let go.

To begin again.......

It's amazing how the time slips by, somewhat unknowingly. One moment your there and the next moment, weeks have passed and your left wondering......'where has the time gone?' My goal for this Lenten season was to post each day with something that inspired growth within me and my family. I seem to always forget that when you're reaching for that higher self, experiences will arise where you will be challenged to practice what it is you're trying to grasp/learn/rediscover/or correct within your self. Needless to say, these last 15 days I have been challenged. Each day that passed I put up the word that inspired me that day.

Here they are::
Trust
Forgiveness
Honesty
Playfulness
Renewal
Expectation
Prayer
Fear
Relief
Gratitude
Gifts
Organization
Breath
Freedom
Creativity

This is a very clear map of the journey we went on; we spent lots of time praying for a dear friend who was in the hospital having surgery, we spent time in the hospital ourselves with our three year old daughter, we came home to amazing friends and family who have gone above and beyond to help us maintain a healthy rhythm, rediscovering our gifts to eachother and our community, and the freedom the comes with discovering and letting go of what works and what doesn't work in our lives. Today, we are holding the word 'cleansing' in our minds.

It is April 1st and it is snowing here. It's technically spring, but, I feel like there is so much turmoil happening everywhere that Mother Nature is trying to keep it slow and still in the places where love can grow freely. I know that snow in spring doesn't bring much joy to many, but, it's a welcome shift for me. I am eager for warmth and sunshine but I can respect and understand what else needs to happen first before we can truly begin again.

Cleansing. To cleanse we are creating a different model for eating, sleeping, playing, and who we spend out time with. We've been so fortunate to be given loving and supportive family members at birth and then be attracted and connected to the most amazing, wonderful, selfless, inspiring friends.......who, at this point in our lives, are our family too. Sadly, there are folks who we are connected to but just aren't able to, for what ever reasons, be unconditional. Thankfully, I am awake enough to realize this, love them anyway, and let them go; allowing them to be what they can without attachment. Another big piece in the 'cleansing' aspect.

However tumoltuous these past few weeks have been, I'm so thankful that everyone has come out of it somewhat unscathed. We're alive, together, loving eachother, and celebrating each new moment together. We have a new found admiration for those who walked through these dark day with us.........and when we were the ones holding up, we felt honored to be able to be the support that was needed.

Life is moving faster and faster. Each day presents a new list of tasks and experiences in addition to the daily grind. Open your hearts. Listen. Be soft and quiet and allow the messages that will come only to flow through you. Love your friends and family. Be thankful for them everyday. Hug them and express your love without hesitation. It's time to begin again.

Our own heart is our temple

"There is only one place to practice compassion: the one you're in." ~ Karen Maezen Miller

Compassion is a virtue. It is living in presence with those around us: loving them, honoring them, suffering with them, being joyful with them........unconditionally. Being in compassion is giving the wholeness of your heart, with nothing to gain.......only to give. Do we do that? Do we give without the hope of receiving? In these times of material wealth and living to only get more, more, more, is it possible to be compassionate anymore? Truly?
It's taken me a few days to think long and hard about this. I've be thorough in my own feelings and actions and I've found the answer:: yes......sometimes. Of course, if it was yes all the time than we'd be Saints! I'm allowing myself the space for forgiveness to see that it is possible to be compassionate while it is also possible to not be. Given the situation, I'm sure you will all understand.
Realizing that I'm admitting to times when my ability to be compassionate is limited I thought how I might change that. Here is an example of when I was lacked in compassion. We had been living in this wonderful old farm house. An 8 room farm house, it was a dream and even existed in one of my husband's favorite Francis Dunnery songs. We had found this house as a last ditch effort before the house we were living in went on the market. You see, we rent our homes, so we're always at the mercy of the owners!!! That's one of the downsides.......at any rate, this farm house was old, 1800's old, but, everyone had their own room, the land was beautiful, a stream ran behind the house, it was close to town, the children had many places to play. It seemed just perfect. The man who owned the house was old, too! He was a wonderful man, kind, generous, and well loved in our area. It was a pleasure to be his neighbor.......even if he was a bit stern with the length he would allow the grass to get! As our time went on there, our landlord passed away. This led us to have to deal with his children, who I knew as a member of our community. It was a nice meeting. They led us to believe that a rent to own option for us was in the plans for down the road, but, nothing would happen soon. Time went on and the new landlord's mother passed on, leaving more to deal with 'the estate'. Sadly, her husband also passed, but during this time, there was no communication about what the plans were for the place until the day we put up a removable fence to keep our littlest from the temptation to run to the front of the house where a main road was. I received a curt phone call from our landlord requesting that the 'very ugly' fence come down as they wouldn't be able to show the property with such an eyesore! So......this was how we learned the house was for sale, but, not to us! It was at this moment that I lost my ability to be compassionate as I was faced with the grim reality of having to uproot my family again, on account of someone elses 'misfortune. I didn't care that she had lost her father several months prior, or that her mother had just passed, or even that her husband was also facing death. We had been kind, understanding, and had taken many jabs and unexpected punches from them, all with a kind and understanding heart. I just couldn't be compassionate anymore. I became quite upset with her and told her that I understand all that she is going thorough but I'm done worrying now about you.......I need to worry about where my family will go now. It seemed to me that our compassion was being taken advantage of and I wouldn't allow that anymore. How could I suffer anymore with her, constantly sending cards with prayers for strength and courage, baking for her and her family, offering assistance at every turn, and then to not be given the same compassion in our new uncertainty, but to be shown that their material wealth was more important than their words spoken. They had no intention of selling us the house, or renting to own. It was lip service given to keep things peaceful. We allowed ourselves to trust, because, well, that's who we are. As you can see, I still struggle with this. Yes, it's in the past and we have moved on (sort of, resentment will be the next item up for discussion!) and have landed in a wonderfully peaceful, loving environment where the children are the happiest they have been and quite frankly, so am I. I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, but, I still regret losing my ability to be compassionate. I never want to act that way again.
Acting out of compassion lead to many things: resentment, anger, frustration, sadness, regret. There is no good that comes from it. Only when you can act in complete compassion can you truly understand what it means to be human. We all falter. That is how we learn. We act out of alignment with our spirits and we then remember who it is we're meant to be and how to do better next time. Life is all about learning so that we can embrace enlightenment, if only for a moment.
I've thought up a daily exercise to focus on living in compassion. It's a simple request of oneself to remain open to love and to allow it to flow freely between you and those you encounter. Sharing love is the greatest of all things and it absolutely promises the return of good things, for giver and receiver. How could you not want to assure yourself good return? Especially when all it requires from you is to give and be love?!

Greet each morning with this message by the Dalai Lama: “Today I am fortunate to have woken up, I am alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it. I am going to use all my energies to develop myself, to expand my heart out to others, to achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings, I am going to have kind thoughts towards others, I am not going to get angry or think badly about others, I am going to benefit others as much as I can.”
Upon rising, look at yourself in the mirror and realize that today is a good day. You have the power to be love and create love in your life. You have the gift of compassion so that when you encounter someone who is miserable and has nothing to offer but toxic venom you can look at them and remember that he has known sadness just as you have or she has known heartbreak just as you have or he as known worry just as you have or she has known loneliness just as you have. We are all alike. We've all know what it feels like to live in fear, shouldn't we acknowledge that and allow those similarities to bring us closer? When that someone comes into your life practice compassion by giving them a smile, acknowledge them and thank them for being here. If it's the barista at the coffee place you frequent, tell her she makes the best latte around and give her an extra tip. If it's the man behind the counter at the gas station, simply let him know you're glad he's here. If it's the checkout person at the grocery store, bag your own groceries, give them a smile and tell them you wish for them a wonderful day, sincerely. While you are looking at your beautiful face in the mirror, make a plan for how you will spread kindness. You will only be excited to share your joy with someone else.
While your driving, turn off the news and put on some good tunes that make you feel good. Raise that vibration. Imagine all of these positive thoughts to be shooting out of your car radiating to all of those around you and beyond. Be a beam of light that is sending out love and compassion. It might seem a little cheesy, but, how could it hurt? You pass a lot of people on your way to work, why not try to reach as many as you can?!
When you're out in the world, smile! Smile and when you meet someone stop, look them in the eye, and listen......really listen to what they are saying. If it's somewhat confrontational, stay focused and realize that you have the power to keep your emotions at bay and pay attention to the details that are only meant for you. Most confrontations are not just about that one thing.......most people struggle with so much that every little thing that is bothering them comes out in all encounters. Maybe your boss is having relationship difficulties and that is why he's so upset that your assignment is late. Maybe your secretary's mother is ill and that's why she is snappy with your request to get her a phone number. Maybe the the mail person is suffering from depression so that's why isn't able to stay focused and keeps misplacing your mail. Compassion. Act with compassion. Ask your boss if everything is OK because you too have known what it's like to be in a rocky relationship. Offer to take your secretary out for coffee, let her know that you're here for her if she needs anything while her mother is ill. Walk down the hall with the mail person, share a joke, let him know that you're glad he works here. It's these little things that can really turn some one's day around. Act with compassion. You know what it's like to be in these spot's shared by your co-workers, friends, family, and strangers who you encounter. Offer them you heart.
"Compassion is a hard-won state of being. Much more than a feeling, compassion is a choice to view suffering is a universal experience. This means viewing illness, loss, and even death as human experiences that are bearable with support. This helps us remain calm and keep our hearts open, and we become able to sit with someone in great physical or emotional pain. Compassion bridges the distance between people often created by suffering. This is not comfortable to do, as we must acknowledge their problems might reflect our own future."

The differences between Sympathy and Compassion::

Sympathy
exhausts both giver and receiver.
defines suffering as helplessness.
wears a fixed mask, tries to mind-read.
counts the minutes, wants to escape.
asks yes/no and rhetorical questions.
holds breath, afraid of being inadequate.
Fills the quiet spaces with the “right” words. Compels others to hug, and stops crying by touch Creates a boundary to separate from their pain.
Compassionnourishes and soothes.
recognizes suffering as a passage.
is authentic and open-minded.
is timeless, refuses to be hurried.
asks open-ended, genuine questions.
breathes and ignores critical self-talk.
knows silence is valid communication.
touches with permission, only to connect.
develops heart connection to share the pain.
Here are some other suggestions on how to work compassion into your daily lives:

• Breath. Focus on your breath. Keep it calm and full. This will allow you to remain calm, clear and focused during your encounters today.


• Expect nothing. Try not to focus on how you can be helpful or how you will feel important by being a support to someone else. Try not to focus on your thoughts of what you think they need and be open to receive whatever they have to give.


• Avoid thinking of others as helpless. When in a situation, reverse it and think of how you would like to be perceived. Treat others the way you would hope to be treated.


• Be calm and try not to rush. Each meeting you have is a chance for a wonderful heart connection. Use it!!! Connect with people, smile, laugh, offer up your love. Be that light you wish to be.......if you're at the store running from aisle to aisle and meet up with a neighbor, stop! Be present. Experience that moment because it will never happen again. Make a positive impression because they will remember, and , so will you.


• Just listen. Try to listen without offering any solutions. Most folks just need some time to sort things out, let feelings go. They don't necessarily need to have someone tell them what to do. Listen. If they ask, offer an idea or two, don't be attached to whether they take you up on it or not, just listen.


• Let them cry. There is no need to stop the tears........in fact tears are what keep us from drowning on the inside (dm). If you feel your tears well up, let them roll! There is no need to quiet the soul when it's trying to remain free.


• Acceptance. Sometimes things are really hard, sad, unfathomable. "Compassion means accepting the reality of what is happening in the moment. " Try not to focus on how you can change a situation, accept that it is what it is and allow the healing to begin.

Reaching out is your gift, allow your compassionate heart to show you how to give love.

The Peace of Wild Things

When despair grows in me
and I wake in the middle of the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children's lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting for their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.

~ Wendell Berry

Love's Divine

Love heals. It's raw and pure. Giving love and sending it to all corners of the Earth. Feeling the sadness and horror that is gripping Japan today. My heart aches. My head aches.

Lent. A time to pray, fast, and give......to be closer to God as we know him/her/it. Being a few dozen countries away from Japan doesn't make it easy to help out. I can't just walk over or fly over and give them our clothes, cook them food, share a hug, or even hold their hand.......but, I can offer them my love from a distance while holding them in the Light. I can realize that all that I have can be taken away in a matter of moments and I could be left with nothing. No family, no material objects, my life. So I will fast from selfishness and taking my life for granted. I will give them what money I can because that will help someone. I will give them my love through prayer and thoughts of goodwill. I will give them my heart, my tears, and my hope that Life will be OK again.

Love......Love's Divine.