Make Lemonade! Well what happens when most of the lemons are moldy and yucky and they're all mixed in with the decent ones? Well, you have to take time and sort through them all and pick out the good ones and toss the yucky ones. That's what I've been doing. Sorting out!
I forgot that when you make the choice to change the course your on.....everything is fair game for upheaval. It seems as if everything comes toppling down on you and then you have to literally rebuild that what was, your life. I chose to make a change, that this will be the Best Year of my Life. In that statement alone is a reasonable amount of things that can go "wrong". In wrong I mean not going the way I had intended simply because I was on my high horse to the Best Year of my Life. I still am, I'm just taking the precribed amount of time to make sure all my ducks are in a row. You can't make change until you are ready......and if certain things aren't ready to shift, its an uphill battle, in 10 feet of snow with no boots to wear! Like the "old days"!
So......in these past 10 days of no writing I have cried, gotten angry, a little depressed, confused, lost, and bewildered. I'm still seeking my Best Year yet, although taking a different route to get there. My body, my past, my resentments, old feelings, etc.....they need to also be released. That's what is happening. I'm allowing them all to come as they may so I can let them go and give myself a clean slate. I've made the declaration the this will be the Best Year of My Life, but not without hard work to make the shift.
Thank you for being patient with me as I continue on the this journey. Today will be more pleasant to deal with than yesterday and I know that I am one step closer to feeling the best I can to continue on my path.
This will be the Best Year of my Life!
"Let's have a merry journey, and shout about how light is good and dark is not. What we should do is not future ourselves so much. We should now ourselves. "NOW thyself" is more important than "Know thyself." Reason is what tells us to ignore the present and live in the future. So all we do is make plans. We think that somewhere there are going to be green pastures. It's crazy. Heaven is nothing but a grand, monumental instance of future. Listen, now is good. Now is wonderful." ~ Mel Brooks