Today was about speaking. How did I do you might ask, well, I fell into the same old traps, but......at least I caught myself. I realized that it is a total defense mechanism for me to clam up and not say anything. But why? For fear of retribution for of what I might say, for fear of saying the wrong thing. For fear. Well, that says it all, doesn't it?
"The psychological condition of fear is divorced from any concrete and true immediate danger. It comes in many forms: unease, worry, anxiety, nervousness, tension, dread, phobia, and so on. This kind of psychological fear is always of something that might happen, not of something that is happening now." ~ Eckhart Tolle
So in my fear, I decided to bite the bullet and talk anyway. I spoke from my heart. I spoke from that place of purpose, that place with meaning. I thought before I spoke. I honored that person I spoke with. As if this may be that last word I might say to them. I smiled when I spoke.....because you can hear a smile in someones voice, ya know! I spoke with enthusiasm. Since this is something new and different, I didn't behave like this all day, but, I did remember and I tried. And I will try again tomorrow.
And, what pray tell, did this do for me, if anything? Well, I felt good speaking. I felt like I was honoring not only the person with whom I was speaking to, but also, myself. I honored ME by being ME! Hmmmmm, most people don't do that anymore. Its amazing to me how we all have forgotten how powerful words are and what they bring with them and cast upon the Earth. A hurtful word will travel around the globe within minutes, hurting anyone in its path. A kind word will linger......dancing sweetly with the person for whom it was meant before drifting and flitting about.Dancing and swaying to the music that kindness brings. Touching the souls and hearts of people everywhere.
And then there's the attack. The powerful note that slices like a hot sword....swoosh! Out of no where. A word meant to be, I don't know what, but words that when put together create such a powerful smack in the face that you feel blind-sided. And, you are blind-sided. These are the most dangerous of words. They create hurt, frustration, disgust, FEAR!!!!
Words. Be kind with them.
So, I'm awaiting the arrival of my books. I can't wait to get started and then share with you the journey to begin a lifetime of change. In the meantime, I have randomly opened the book The Prophet (yes, I like this book) and will choose another new and different course to take. "Then an old man, a keeper of an inn, said, Speak to us of Eating and Drinking." Eating and Drinking......oh boy!
"And he said: Would that you could live on the fragrance of the Earth, and like an air plant be sustained by the light. But since you must kill to eat, and rob the newly born of its mother's milk to quench your thirst, let it then be an act of worship."
I was a vegetarian for eight years. I transitioned back to an omnivores diet after my first child was born. Since then, I have always quietly honored my food. Have I done that well? Probably not. I haven't ALWAYS thanked God for my meal. I haven't ALWAYS thought of the sacrifice of life, of energy. That seems terrible to me. Why haven't I. It really should be a ritual with every meal, snack, tea, treat. Something, someone, has given of itself/his or her self to give me what I will inevitably eat or drink.
"Let there be in your heart a song"
A song of praise. A blessing on this meal. May this meal be blessed and all that gave of themselves to make this meal possible.
"Earth who gives to us this food. Sun who makes it ripe and good. Dear Earth, Dear Sun by you we live. Our loving Thanks to you we give. AMEN"
I guess my buds of tomorrow shall blossom the ever fragrant praise and wonder of the food I eat and drink. I will become more aware of how I give Thanks for my nourishment.
Will you join me on this journey towards everlasting gratitude? Gratitude for new and different. Gratitude for words to speak. Gratitude for daily nourishment and the sacrifices that come with it.
"Remember God's bounty in the year. String the pearls of His favor. Hide the dark parts, except so far as they are breaking out in light! Give this one day to thanks, to joy, to gratitude!" ~ Henry Ward Beecher
"Let's have a merry journey, and shout about how light is good and dark is not. What we should do is not future ourselves so much. We should now ourselves. "NOW thyself" is more important than "Know thyself." Reason is what tells us to ignore the present and live in the future. So all we do is make plans. We think that somewhere there are going to be green pastures. It's crazy. Heaven is nothing but a grand, monumental instance of future. Listen, now is good. Now is wonderful." ~ Mel Brooks